Lonely in Dallas

So we've been married for just over 5 months and in Dallas for almost 4 months already. Crazy...it feels like so much longer. This has been the most difficult and painful time of stretching and growing that I have ever experienced, yet I know that God will give me the strength to get through so many changes. Graduating from college, getting married, moving, starting a new job, being alone for a month in a huge, unfamilar city, and having Chris start medschool had created a lot of stress. It's so hard for me to give it all over to God and not know what will happen next. Sometimes I feel like I have no purpose other than to support my husband in his faithful pursuit of God's will for his life, which is okay. I love him so much and enjoy taking care of him in little ways, however I want and need more. I need to get plugged into a ministry or some place where I can serve others and share Christ. It's just so hard at the end of the day when I am exhausted and have so much to do at home to take care of and get ready for another day of work and school. It seems like I've been praying for a desire to be in God's word and love others, but I continually find myself wrapped up in my own things and ignoring everything and everyone else. I know that this is why there is no joy in my life right now and I long for the past--my time in high school and the first years of college when I was much happier, enjoyed being with others, had close friends to hang out with, couldn't gain a pound, and never had to worry about money. Now, I feel like I'm in quicksand...the more I struggle to get out, the deeper I sink. Everything either ticks me off or makes me cry...I need to turn to God, but I'm angry. Angry that I'm somewhere I don't really want to be and lonely. I don't understand. I guess God never promised us that life would be easy and I know that He loves me unconditionally...being stretched and blind is just painful, but I need to have faith and trust that God is in control. In the meantime, I guess I'll hunt for ministry opportunities and keep praying for strength. 'Til next time...